"it may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining an egg. we are like eggs at present. and you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. we must be hatched or go bad. " -c.s. lewis

Sunday, September 25, 2011

the man next door and the equal money system


my sister was taking me to work yesterday and we were passing my corner neighbors house and my sister says, u gotta see what hes doing now. our corner neighbor is always in his backyard. almost literally always back there. he has a garden back there to which he has built a frame around with wood so the vines and flowers can grow all around. he does fires, sing alongs with the guitar and he does whatever he can with wood. he has tables and chairs and benches made from tree trunks and various pieces of wood that look really cool. we turn the corner and i see this huge wooden..lol well thing. its being made for a shelter/patio area for his backyard. hes been working back there for a while on something and i turn the corner and see this thing :). my sis says, isnt that cool. of course i agreed. she says how its obvious that he works or has worked and saved since he is able to have this house for his family and cars and such but its really cool that he is able to do what he really enjoys doing. which is working with wood and with his hands. whenever we look or go outside, there he is doing something in the backyard. i metioned that in an equal money system people will not have to worry about if they are going to be able to eat or have somewhere to sleep or have clean water or have all around care. because in an equal money system life is valued. period. and what life needs life will get. so all people would be able to enjoy the resources that this earth has for us ALL. equally and respectfully. all people would be able to enjoy self expression without worry or fear of survival. i said to her, in an equal money system both our jobs would not exist and if they did they would not exist in the form they are in now. ( shes is a wine representative and sells wine to resturants. its a extremely stressful job they way they would like them to do it (underhanded, manipulative and forceful) and of course its all about profiting over people. i am a brand ambassador. i pretty much represent different companies at promotional events or festivals or samplings. i interact with all different types of people which i enjoy, but i basically convince people to buy shit by giving them shit and playing on different idea or emotions, in a nutshell.) i asked her, what would u do if this were in equal money system and u did not have to worry all the time about if u and my niece and my brother will eat or have some shelter to lay ur head or about money money money? she says, id love to paint all day long! she is an awesome artist. she draws and paints and her expression through her paintings is really cool. she likes to show the movement of that which she paints. for instance she would paint the color of the sway of wind a butterfly shes painted has just gone through. cool stuff. with her being pregnant and prepartion for everything that comes with creating a child and then having a child and immediately going back to the hustle of work has deleted her time for her self expression through art in place of survival. within an equal money system self expression will be encouraged. self expression that does so within the principles of oneness and equality and a respect for all as self. the rat race we currently live in will be no more. once the need to do whatever one has to to eat and keep cloths on ones back and a roof over ones head and clean water to drink and so and so forth is realised to be unneccessary if one is operating within what is best for all, then we can collectively birth life here in the physical. there will be work. but all will be able to work and contribute themselves fully. all are NOT able to work and contribute themselves fully within the current system. some have no opportunities at all the way we have accepted and allowed this world. this will change with the implementation of the equal money system.
i took a picture of my neighbor atop his expression. may not be able to tell in the picture, but hes smiling :)

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

cancer, bottle caps, limitation and the illusion of care


a few weeks ago i worked this event where we were trying to get kids interested in tennis. we had these courts set up and rackets that were smaller sized geared to the hands of children rather than a normal sized racket. we hit balls around with them and gave them pointers about tennis and stretching and just overall encouragement for the children in relation to tennis. this was a hot day so we had tons of water. the first thing i noticed showing up was that there were empty water bottles everywhere. i only worked back up the first day of the event meaning i show up and if i was needed i stay, if not i go. so the first day i went. upon showing up the second day to actually work i noticed the empty bottles. i assumed that we were giving these water bottles to the children and parents that came as well as the people working as to "why" there were so many empty water bottles everywhere. turns out the water bottles where just for BAs (brand ambassadors). it was as though no BA had put a water bottle in a trash can at all the whole first day. so after i was told that they were all ours, i went around and picked them all up while being looked at like i was crazy for doing so. we had a big set up in a parking lot and the BAs assumed it was ok to just throw the empty plastic water bottles on the ground for those that clean the lot to pick up when we had many trash cans surrounding the area of our set up. we wished to display the illusion of care for kids and their health in relation to getting out and getting involved in tennis (care with a self interested chaser) but could not care to put our trash in a trash can and show ALL AROUND, true, conditionless, limitless care for kids by taking care of the earth we bring them onto.
at the end of the day we were wrapping things up with paperwork and such and i look to the side and see this guy, a fellow BA, going through the trash cans and taking the bottle caps off of all of the empty water bottles. i went over and asked him why he was doing that. he said he had forgot that his wife told him to get all the bottle caps he could because there is a program that gives kids free chemotherapy for bottle caps that are brouught in. ~breathe~ now when he said this another BA near us hearing this was like "ohh thats so cool that they do that". ~breathe~..ok i honestly just wanted to scream and say "ARE WE FUCKING SERIOUS WITH THIS ILLUSION OF CARE BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!" i have to watch were anger tries to direct me. there are moments when i see injustice or people spouting bullshit or even myself about to or just subconsiously spout some bullshit and i just want to break down in tears lol. it really saddens me. not like im overwhelemed with guilt or anything. its just like, "really with this shit?!!?..damn.". but there is no action within reacting. so i had to breathe through that inital moment of sadness and anger at the situation and i said that it really suks that we have the ability to help people with cancer with chemotherapy but we make everything about profit instead of people. i said if we REALLY cared about people with cancer in a respect of life we would give them chemotherapy or whatever treatment they needed. period. the guy said, "yeah thats so true but every little bit helps." .. in actuality, every little bit does not help. its the manifestation of limitation. and this accepted limitation only breeds more limitation. thats why we accept that giving to a charity that helps a couple people is doing the "right" thing or practical thing. why we accept that doing a food drive that feeds a neighborhood of people actually does anything for reason starvation exist and stopping it. why we get excited at a program that says one child dying of cancer who brings in tons of water bottle caps should get more hours of chemo than another child dying of cancer who has no way of drinking clean water let along collecting water bottle caps. until we stop accepting limitaion as a way of life, all we do will be manifested from our self accept limitation.
i did some digging afterward and found out the 'caps for chemo' program was a hoax. there is so much misinformation out there and it says much about us that we would rather accept something as immediate truth when heard instead of investigating it. so now that guy spends his time collecting caps for no reason and feeling good about himself for what he considers helping. as a result of this accepted limitation within the definiton of helping and care, we accept and allow people with cancer to die everyday when we have the ability and resources to honestly help all of them. we accept and allow people to die everyday of starvation when we have the ability and resources to feed all of them. we accept and allow this by accepting and allowing a system that values profit over life. by accepting and allowing a system that makes a fixed game out of life. it is time we collectively/individually take steps to correct this point. and that begins with the implementation of a system that truley cares for life as a whole. the equal money system.
in an equal money system help, in regards to the needs of cancer patients, would be given conditionlessly to all that need it. period. it would no longer be about money or making people collect water bottle caps or jump through hoops to fucking live. life will no longer be the accepted survival game that it is now. there will be no losers or winners, worthys and unworthys. the value we currently give to life is disgusting. within an equal money system the respect of life as a whole is the bottom line from which all actions will stem from.

investigate the equal money system ~ www.equalmoney.org ~

Friday, September 9, 2011

breakfast with a fly


since i began to realise myself within oneness of all life and all that is here i have a different relationship with insects. i didnt have a fear of them before, but i also didnt have a care for them either. i wouldnt hesitate to pick up a shoe or any smashing object to kill a roach or fly or any insect really. in doing that i really disconnected myself for apart of myself as one and equal with what is here, which is other life known as insects. complete and utter superior attitude we have for everything, but specifically insects in this case for myself. so as i have become to realise myself as a part of all life, i see myself within the insects now. if there is one in the house, or whomevers house im in, i will go get something to swoop it up and take it outside. not from the starting point of a 'savior construct' but as a point of respect for the life within the insect being. and also accounting for the current fact that what people do in this instance, is robotically kill the insect that is in "our" space. theres been many a times that someone is going to find a shoe im and like, "relax, there is no need for that, lemme get a cup." i mean, its a simple as that. care is. my sister said to me one day some time ago, " damn when u really say ur gonna do something, u do it." i was getting a moth that was attracted to the light in the living room that my siblings wanted to smash. it was just what needed to be done. i would like to get to a point where ALL things that just need to be done are done within me as "easy" as realising respect for all insects. i was having a bowl of cereal with soy milk yesterday morning and a fly was landing on me :). it would sit on my knee and watch me eat or fly on the bowl and watch me eat. it hung out for a while as i ate my breakfast. i got down to the last bit of milk. my legs were crossed and the fly sat on my knee. i drank the milk but left a spoon of some. i put it down towards my knee and the fly came up into the spoon and drank some milk. it was really cool :) had breakfast with a fly :)


Wednesday, September 7, 2011



for a pig to be considered a suckling it must still be suckling. meaning the little one is still fed on its mothers milk. at no more than a month old (between the ages of 2 to 6 weeks), we rip these sucklings away from their mothers to kill it and eat it. this really shows the cruel nature that we have allowed of ourselves. its not the fact THAT we eat animals. its HOW we go about the shit that reveals the dismissive cruelty in us. even though we eat animals to live doesnt mean that we cannot support them to have a life of dignity up until that point where they support us. within an equal money system the basis for action is what is best for all. so there will be NO eating of sucklings. its cruel and unneccessary and unacceptable within what is best for all. all pigs will live a dignified life within and equal money system that supports a dignified life for ALL. not just human beings. all beings. we will no longer rip the young from its mother to feed our greed. cause thats what it is doing. not just "trying out a different form of pig". its more than that. its the unneccessary abuse of animals to create a "better" experience for ones self. all are not considered within that. the pig is not considered within that. i mean, would we want our child ripped from our arms at 2 weeks only to be killed for the amusement of someones ego?

this is a child. not a human child, but a child nonetheless..

Monday, September 5, 2011

there is a fungus among us

i was watching bizarre foods earlier today. the guy was in tiawan trying all kinds of local dishes. he had just finished eating at a place that cooked everything with different types of tea. even had deep fried tea leaves. they use different types of teas for differnt physcial ailments or to increase support to certain areas of the body. very interesting. but afterward the guy was taken to this store with all these dry roots and barks and leaves and all kinds of stuff. the guide tells him of some of the uses for certain things around and then leads him to a cabinet in the store. the guide opens the cabinet saying "u must see this". he pulls out a nicely packaged red and gold box and says "this may look like worms but its actually a fungus! its GREAT for the lungs! want to know how great?" the bizarre foods guy says, yes. the guide tells him," well, in american money one pound would cost u 8 thousand dollars." --- ok, so i have been looking to see if i could find information on this fungus and what it actually does for the lungs but i was not able. though i see that the point of 'making things that will help all and should be available to all only available to those with money' can still be looked at. say we find a fungus among us that has the capabilities to assist greatly in the restoration of lung function. instead of seeing the importance to the world as a whole we look at how we can profit from it. though the fungus will provide physical support to bodies, that point is disregarded in favor of how much money can be manipulated out of those bodies by holding death above our heads or the promise of a superior experience of ones self compared to other-selves. we have an outright price on life currently! im certain we are allowing people to die for things we have cures for if we allow people to die for lack of money to buy food. there really is no telling what we are capable of doing at this point because we accept and allow secrecy and greed and fear to direct us. food, clean water, shelter, health care, education, opportunity, access, THESE are rights. its fucking bullshit to see ourselves within this disrespect that we have for the physical.. and its such a clear point to see within our world. there is no debating its fact nor its unacceptability. money should NOT be the deciding factor on if someone lives or dies with dignity.

Sunday, September 4, 2011



i was talking to my brother and sister the other day about this post a friend of mine made on facebook. she posted a status saying to forgive her if she wasnt overly sensitive to the plight of those who just went through hurricane irene because when we went through hurricane andrew back in 1992 we were out of power for 3 months. i was saying how it was really crazy that we can go through something like we did in hurricane andrew all to create accept and allow superiority within ourselves because we lived through it. like we did anything really to deserve to live through it anymore than those who died did anything to deserve to die in it. many survivers of something feel that they are either in debted to something or owed something for surviving. its crazy how we attached these feelings to certain situations and how those feelings lead us to react in a certain matter when faced with similar emotion invoking situations. i was basically saying how the statement in the status is a disregard of life as a whole and disregarding of the care that one should have for another as one would like another to have for them. its a big 'fuck u' to those dealing with hurricane irene and a 'dont even try it' to anyone in any future hurricanes that dont meet the death toll and power outtage time of hurricane andrew for which my friends care, in situations of a hurricane, is dependent on the andrew comparison. my brother jumps in saying, "thats the thing. that is HER opinion. u cant tell someone what to think or feel. people are entitled to their own opinion." i had to take a moment to consider this statement.. i said to him, well lets look at opinions as a whole. not just her opinion to not care for beings that have not been through what she had been through, but all opinions. some peoples opinion is that it is ok/cool/acceptable to molest children. some peoples opinion is that it is ok/cool/acceptable to murder someone they dont like. some peoples opinion is that it is ok/cool/acceptable to treat another like worthless garbage. some peoples opinion is that its ok/cool/acceptable to beat baby seals to death with a bat. some peoples opinion is that its ok/cool/acceptable to rape and beat on a woman. in actuality, everyone is NOT entitled to their own fucking opinion. cause all of our "own opinions" are fucking abusive. we accept and allow the "everyones entitled to their own opinon" bullshit without even considering what an opinion is and the possibilities and actualities that are 'peoples opinions'. opinions create seperation between self and others as well as provide fuel to the ego. for one can always find self at the top of all statements that contain the words 'in my opinion'. fuck "my opinon" about something. what are the facts about said thing. what is verifyable without anyones self interest as a basis. opinions are not needed within equality. because all are doing what is best for all. in everything, all are considering what is best for all. that requires no ones opinion.